


The One Where Kevin Flynn Eats A Tide Pod and Needs to Be Taken to the Emergency Room

by quantum27



Series: a cup of good intentions (tron one shots) [5]
Category: Tron (Movies), Tron - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dialogue Heavy, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Humor, Short One Shot, Swearing, There is an inside joke about 'The War' that even i don't know about, alan is just -_-, rated T because swear words i guess idk, the characters came up with it i don't know where it came from and i'm the writer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:14:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26377129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quantum27/pseuds/quantum27
Summary: You read the title.That's it. That's the fic.
Relationships: Alan Bradley & Kevin Flynn, If you want, Lora Baines-Bradley & Kevin Flynn, Lora Baines-Bradley/Alan Bradley, Lora Baines-Bradley/Alan Bradley/Kevin Flynn, you may view this as
Series: a cup of good intentions (tron one shots) [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1872664
Comments: 10
Kudos: 30





	The One Where Kevin Flynn Eats A Tide Pod and Needs to Be Taken to the Emergency Room

**Author's Note:**

> it took kevin flynn like 1000s cycles to get a (admittedly not that good, kinda questionable) impulse control,,,,,you can not tell me he would not eat one

“I can’t believe I’m driving Kevin Flynn to the emergency room on a Perfectly Fine Saturday Afternoon because he ate a fucking Tide Pod.” Alan half-shouted, fingers frustratingly tapping on the steering wheel. Lora, in the passenger seat, snorted, looking up from her phone to her fiancee briefly. Flynn groaned in the backseat, sprawled over it. 

“I can believe it.” Lora said going back to her phone. 

“I don’t understand how you’re just texting- _Who_ are you texting?” Alan threw an irritated glance at her. 

“Roy.” 

“Of-fucking-course.” 

Lora shook her head in amusement. Alan glared at Flynn using the rear-view mirror. The programmer in question blinked wearily at him. 

“It’s the _forbidden fruit_ , Alan.” He said as if he’d had an epiphany, in lieu of a proper explanation. 

Alan let out a very harsh sigh, “That’s why it’s **_forbidden_** , Kevin!”

Flynn flinched, “It’s _Just_ Flynn.”

Alan shook his head slightly as they turned around a corner, “I honestly don’t care right now.” 

Lora smiled, patting his shoulder somewhat mockingly, “Don’t judge him too harshly; he lost his impulse control in _The War._ ” 

The inside joke made Alan snort, hands loosening on the steering wheel a tiny bit, “Yeah well, I lost my patience in _The War_.” 

“Anyway,” Lora continued, “I want to see if they put charcoal down his throat.” 

Flynn whined in the backseat, kicking a leg against the floor, (he’d already been scolded earlier for kicking the back of Alan’s seat and the door and window of the car.), “Why do you want to see that!?”

Lora looked back at him with a raised eyebrow, then said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, “‘Cause it’s kinda cool.” 

“What did I ever do to you?” Flynn retorted.

“Well-” 

“No, don't answer that! I’m in too much pain already!” He sighed dramatically because no matter what situation he was a drama queen. 

“If you die in my car, I’m selling your arcade.” Alan jumped in with an uncontrolled grin. Though...he might keep Dance Dance Revolution if he ever had to sell the arcade. Which he definitely had never thought about. Ever. 

“Nooo _ooooooo_.” 

“And the couch goes to the curb!” Added Lora. 

“ _Noooooooo_ oooooo, not my couch.” He sounded genuinely more distressed about the couch than the prospect of the arcade being sold. 

Lora’s phone lit up with a notification. She turned back to it, reading quickly. Alan frowned as he saw a small smile grow into a big one very quickly. 

“I don’t trust that look.” He murmured. 

Lora’s head shot up and looked him as directly in the eye as she could, considering he was driving. 

“Roy said you did the cinnamon challenge a few years back.” 

Alan coughed as the memory struck him for a moment and then practically growled, “That _little snitch_.” 

“Snitches get stitches.” Flynn tapped his fingers on the back of Lora’s seat. 

“Snitches LOSE their popcorn privileges for a month.” Alan pushed his glasses up forcefully with a thumb. 

“Oh, no!” Flynn put a hand against his chest, and the other against his head, as if he were in a high-school Shakespeare play, “Roy’s lost his popcorn privileges in _The War_.” 

“Damn right he did.” Alan confirmed. 

The car quieted for a moment. It was far too quiet for a space that contained Kevin Flynn. 

“To be honest,” Flynn’s voice finally drifted from the backseat, “Even _I_ didn’t do the cinnamon challenge.” 

Alan spluttered and then retorted, incredulous, “Wait, so laundry detergent is fine, but cinnamon is too far!?” 

“Flames, on the side of his face-” Lora said out of the corner of her mouth. 

Flynn laughed, which quickly turned into a groan, “Nice!” 

Alan scoffed and would’ve rolled his eyes if he wasn’t a responsible driver. The hospital was finally coming into view and the three cheered with various levels of enthusiasm. 

“Hey, y’think Tron would eat a Tide Pod?” Flynn grunted as he sat up, clutching the seats in front of him tightly, knuckles white. 

“No!” Alan swatted the other man with one hand. 

“I’ll pay you twenty bux if you can get it on camera.” Lora bet. 

“Deal.” He reached awkwardly over the seat to shake her hand. 

“No!” Alan squeaked, “You’re not giving my program Tide Pods!” 

* * *

“You gave my program Tide Pods didn’t you.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, glasses with one hand. 

Flynn’s face was red, and he was straining for breath in between laughs as he wobbled on his feet, fresh from un-digitizing. 

“Yeah well-” He wheezed, “I think- I think it may be the Grid’s newest popular snack.” 

“You’re kidding.” He deadpanned back. 

“Ha! I wish. And I got it all on camera, too! The face of Alan Bradley eating a Tide Pod, granted, it was Tron but, hey! Pay up Lora!” 

Alan sighed. 

In the end though, the video of the security monitor very seriously eating a Tide Pod was...admittedly funny.

**Author's Note:**

> Not pictured is Tron fucking loving eating a tidepod, Clu 1 and Ram convincing Clu 2 it's a User delicacy, Bodhi, and Mara trying to convince Zed and Beck to eat some, and when Beck does he then also joins in pestering Zed, Gibson and Anon deciding they are much more interesting to hurl at each other because if you throw them hard enough they kinda go splat, and Able and Yori just sitting back and watching the chaos. 
> 
> Thanks for coming to my TedTalk. 
> 
> p.s. this fic is in comic sans in my google doc.


End file.
